So I’m a little confused as to how I won most musically gifted as a superlative considering less than 20 people from school have ever heard me play but regardless thank you very very much. I’ve been deciding whether to share my stuff or not via social media for a while now but I figured for this occasion why not. Anyways this is me on my out-of-tune baby grand. I call it Chime. Its one of my latest favorites. Its my 27th composition. Enjoy & tysm.
Holy fucking shit Ian I didn’t know you were Mozart
This is so beautiful I could crythis is the only nice sound quality one lol
Seriously. So talented.
I went to church tonight. The message was about finding our identity in Christ. Seeing ourselves that way God sees us. I came to some realizations during the service. I pretty much base 100% of my self-worth, confidence, and identity, in how I feel other people love me. I forget about God’s love and focus on other people’s love. For example, this weekend sucked for me. I convinced myself that I didn’t feel love from other people, so I didn’t feel loved. I spent a large part of the weekend alone in bed. One friend bailed on me on Saturday (not even a huge deal) and that set off a long reaction to where I felt like I wasn’t loved. But in reality, this is irrelevant. The only love I should be focusing on is God’s. While being loved by people is great, it doesn’t compare to the love that God has for me. God’s love is unconditional and never changing. I need to constantly remind myself of this daily so that I don’t get distracted by how someone else makes me feel. This is a tough one for me because rejection is a really hard thing for me to deal with. It can completely distract me from everything else, especially God. I’ll have to work on getting over that and focus on what really matters, God.
So, why am I a Christian?
Because I know I’m a train wreck in a dumpster fire. But I also know that God loves me 100% as is, right now, in the midst of the burning carnage that is often my life. I know that if I were to stack up my cards against most church people I’d fold every time. I’m not that good at following rules and I run my mouth a lot. And yet, God loves me and is cheering for me as I get better and especially when I fall down. Where I see failure he sees opportunity for growth. Where I see addiction he sees an opportunity to take a step. Where I’ve given up, he whispers, “You can make it”.
So maybe if we can all accept the idea that God’s love is wholly separate from our actions, receive it, and give it to others maybe then we’d have more Christians that look like Christ. Christians that don’t feel it’s important to beat people down with their theology and doctrine, but instead spend their lives in the gutter bleeding alongside other people.
I think maybe then, we might just see Christ’s kingdom here on earth.
Thank you Taco Bell!
this is my favorite picture